And attitude of gratitude

Today I was reading an excerpt online from a book called Conversation with God by Neal Donald Walsch. I haven’t decided whether I will buy this book or not but lately I am on this quest for information for the law of attraction. I want to change the space I operate in, in my mind and heart. While reading this excerpt, something really hit home with me. Neal Donald Walsch presents this question to the Lord “Does that mean I can ask for anything I want? Are you saying that praying for something actually pushes it away from us?”. Here was the Lord’s answer, make sure to let this sink in for a moment before you continue;

“This is a question which has been asked through the ages- and has been answered whenever it has been asked. Yet you have not heard the answer, or will not believe it. The question is answered again, in today’s terms, and today’s language, thusly: You will not have that for which you ask, nor can you have anything you want. This is because your very request is a statement of lack, and your saying you want a thing only works to produce that precise experience- wanting- in your reality. The correct prayer is therefore never a prayer of supplication, but a prayer of gratitude. When you thank God in advance for that which you choose to experience in your reality, you, in effect, acknowledge that it is there…in effect. Thankfulness is thus the most powerful statement to God; an affirmation that even before you ask, I have answered. Therefore never supplicate. Appreciate”

Now, I don’t know about you but appreciating what I have before I have it is the hardest thing ever. Controlling my thoughts towards the positive outcome is equally challenging. Finally, I realized why this is hard for me; most times I do not feel I deserve that which I ask for. Like I am making or have made too many mistakes in my life to be worthy of receiving what I ask for in prayer. (that was rough to type out loud). Now that has to be the devil, right? Leading me to believe that somehow I have made myself unworthy of the unconditional love, provisions, and blessing God has made readily available to me. Then I try to talk myself out of that thought, remembering that I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalms 139:14), that his plans for me are great (Jer. 29:11), and he literally stitched me together (Psalms 139:13). I still struggle with all this miraculousness. I know my worth, I know how special I am, I know what makes me stand out, I know what God has put in me, but I do not always believe it to be true. Instead I choose to believe my feelings about whatever current situation I am in. I look for the approval of others instead of tuning into my approval of myself.

I feel like whenever I talk about this it seems so easy. But I am alone with my thoughts, and it’s hard. It gets hard to believe in yourself sometimes. It is hard to believe that I am destined for greatness, and worthy of all things, that the desires of my heart will surely be granted to me.

For the rest of September and the month of October I choose God. I choose to pray with gratitude for what I hope to have in my life. I choose to accept that I deserve the best life has to offer. I choose to continue to think positively about that which I want, and not let what happens in the midst of that deter my thoughts. I choose to live in each and every moment. I choose to see every peril as a blessing, and every experience as a lesson. I choose to believe that all things work together for my good. Period.

I choose the good life. 😊